Rob's Blog

Smoking
03rd Dec 2006 23:12

Two smoking barrels For Ben's stag do we dressed in our finest country gentleman attire and went clay pigeon shooting. Shotguns are very loud, very inaccurate, and every bit as fun to fire as I'd have imagined. Hitting a rather impressive 26 out of 30 has proved that I'm every bit as ruthless with a real shotgun as I am in Halo. You have been warned. 8 smoking cigars Post shoot we went to a pub and all lit a cigar in Ben's honor. Very manly we thought. Also very smoky. (I maintain that two puffs on a cigar doesn't count as smoking!). We literally filled the pub with smoke requiring the locals open the doors and windows and general look at us with disdain. The fact that Ben was wearing snake skin trousers and a reindeer hat had already resulted in us getting noticed. The guy from Smokey You remember that highly popular song “Living next door to Alice?” covered by Roy Chubby Brown as “Who the f**k is Alice?”. I got chatting to a bloke in the pub who reliably informed me that life wasn't fair. The reason that life isn't fair is that he was in Smokey, the band that sang the original version. He's now drinking alone in a pub in Sawbridgeworth rather than being famous. So life isn't fair. I had no reason to doubt him... but having Googled Smokey I'm not so sure he wasn't pulling my leg. Smoking tires Unfortunately, whilst chatting to the guy from Smokey in a smoke filled pub after the whole “Lock stock and two smoking barrels” experience someone forgot to do a head count. So I had a few chilled pints with the locals whilst the two cars conferred, concluded they had indeed forgotten me, and did a u-turn at the next motorway junction to come and pick me back up. ... I definitely chose the wrong week to stop smoking!