I’ve noticed a bit of a trend in my random postings, it seems I’m much more likely to post a blog just after I get back from a run. Today is no exception.

I just got back from a run (you didn’t see that coming did you!). I say a ‘run’ but that isn’t really right. That would imply that the main focus of the activity was running, when in truth most of my time was spent unintentionally destroying flies with my forehead whilst constantly spitting, cursing, and generally wishing a death upon flies in any manner whatsoever as long as it didn’t involve my face.

I swear I actually saw one fly past me, hesitate for a second, then turn around and make a dash for my eye screaming “Jihad! Jihad!”

At first I felt that the flies must just be bouncing off me. After all, at a generous guess I can’t have been lolloping along at more than about 8mph. I’ve been reliably informed that the average speed of a housefly is 4.6mph… factor in a bit of variation for wind and you’ve got a collision at something less than 14mph…

… then I realised that to a fly I must be the comparative size of a large aircraft carrier, and that that flies are essentially only made of air, wings, and an irrational desire to crash into large panting objects.

From an evolutionary perspective it just seems like a pretty bad idea. After all, you don’t see me being attracted to things that are going to kill me. On that note I’m gonna finish my coffee and crack open a beer

As a guy I don’t particularly like hitting girls. It’s something that, thankfully, goes against my natural inclination.

There’s two types of girls that do martial arts; the type that get annoyed because you treat them like girls, and type that get annoyed because you hit them even though they’re girls. They’re almost impossible to distinguish between until they’re annoyed. Worse still, sometimes the same girls seem to alternate between the two types. I think it’s got something to do with the alignment of the planets or something.

Spar too aggressively or not aggressively enough with the wrong type and they get pissed off. That’s the problem with mixed sex training for martial arts. Whatever the alignment of the planets, hitting girls pretty much always annoys them, you just can’t win!